Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

3/27 - Skiing, Kid Jokes, and Rocky on speed!

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

*sigh* It was a school night tonight. Not much time to type out a
long story, but I did go around and ask everyone if they had any
good Joke of the Day stories. No one did, but son #4 said he skied
most of the time today without holding on to the instructor’s
pole. He also said he wants me to go again with him next Tuesday.
Hmm... There’s supposed to be 3 feet of new snow in the mountains
tonight. I guess if I have to go skiing, I guess I could...

Son #4 also said, “I have some jokes for you dad!”

Here they are...

Why did Tigger put his head into a toilet?
Because he was looking for Pooh!
[Keep in mind gang, these are 6 year old boy jokes]

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Why did the chicken cross the playground?
Because he wanted to get to the other slide.

What did one wall say to the other wall?
I’ll meet you at the corner.

How many vampires does it take to change a light bulb?
Zero! (Because vampires like the dark!)

My sweet wife just chimed in. “How many teenagers does it take to
change a light bulb? Only one! They just hold the light bulb up
and the whole world revolves around them!”

She said, “I keep telling that joke to son #1, he doesn’t like it

Enjoy Today’s Jokes!

p.s. Did I ever tell you that life was like a roll of toilet
paper? The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes. With a
wife, kids, Church, Scouts, work, school, and JOTD (yeah, probably
in that order) I’m feeling a little squished with time. Which
brings me to today’s video. Have you ever wanted to watch all of
the Rocky movies at once? Now is your chance! This little gem will
show you Rocky I through Rocky VI in just 5 seconds!


Cartoon Section

Headline News Section

Mothers eating beef could threaten sons' fertility

Dog Performs Heimlich Maneuver on Owner
Does anyone think this is really true?

Today's Video Section

Rocky I – VI in just 5 seconds.


Did you know?

On April 1, 1998, the fast-food giant took out an ad in USA Today
announcing a left-handed Whopper, with condiments placed so
southpaws' toppings wouldn't drip out the right side of the
sandwich. Thousands of folks actually ordered the fake burger.


My friend Allison adopted a stray cat and took him to the vet to
be neutered.

"I'm about 90 percent certain he's been fixed," the vet said.

"How can I be 100 percent sure?" Allison asked.

"Watch to see if he does any 'male' things."

"He already lies on the couch all day," she said. "If he starts
hogging the remote, I'll bring him in."


They say our mothers really know how to push our buttons –
because they installed them.
~Robin Williams


When a nun collapsed in the sales representative's office at our
time-share resort, the rep ran to the front-desk manager. "Two
nuns walked into the sales office, and one of them fainted!" she
yelled breathlessly. Unfazed, the manager just looked at her.
"Well," said the rep, "aren't you going to do anything?" He
replied, "I'm waiting for the punch line."

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