Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

6/29 - Crazy Fast Pink Shirt

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Yesterday while my sweet wife and I were out spending the day
together, I announced that I needed some short sleeve shirts.
(After all, it is a little late in the year to be wearing my long
sleeve shirts to work!) We stopped and I got a couple. Then, on
the way out we looked at the bargain shelf. $10 shirts. Hmm... not
bad. Then I spotted a pink one in my size, and daring me to buy
it. “Hey, how about this one?” “You? Wearing a pink shirt? I’d
like to see that!” I couldn’t let that challenge go buy, so we got

When I put it on this morning, son #3 said, “A PINK SHIRT?!”
“Yeah?” I said. He said, “That’s a girl’s color...”. I turned to
my sweet wife and said, “I’m going to count all of the comments I
get today on my new shirt.” I got a grand total of 1. It was from
my ‘Harry Potter’ friend at work. “Pink!” She said. I said
relieved, “Thanks. I didn’t think anyone was going to notice.”

Son #4 calls our minivan “the tank” and my Alero the “crazy fast
red car”. Last month was my 2 year anniversary of buying the car,
and I haven’t had a ticket yet. That is until today. I was a bit
late to work, going with the flow of traffic, and I got nailed. I
was amazed that the whole event took less than 6 minutes. From me
being pulled over, to having to sign the ticket, “Not admitting
guilt sir.” to being let go. So, I guess its traffic school for
me, plus a hefty fine. The officer gave me a ticket for going 5
mph over, but also wrote down my actual speed that two officers
clocked me at. (No, I’m not going to tell...) So, I guess I should
fell relieved. I was hoping for a warning, but with a snazzy pink
shirt on, I don’t think that would have helped. At least he didn’t
say anything about my 3 week old expired plates!

Enjoy today’s Jokes!


I am an oral surgeon, and once I was scheduled to extract four
wisdom teeth from Jim, a high-school football player, who had
opted to be sedated for the procedure. As the intravenous
anesthesia was being administered, I asked Jim how he was
feeling. "Man," he replied, struggling to keep his eyes open, "I
feel like I'm in English class."


Because of professional commitments, my wife stayed in Maryland
for a year after I took a teaching job in South Carolina. Some of
my ninth-grade music-appreciation students, however, had
difficulty understanding our separation. One day, while I was
playing a Beethoven symphony for them, a girl asked, "Do you
listen to that kind of music at home?" When I answered that I did,
another student muttered, "No wonder his wife won't live with


As my husband, the county highway commissioner, was driving to the
hospital for treatment of his painful knee injury, he decided to
take advantage of the hospital's Valet parking. As he exited his
car, a young man with the Valet parking co., comes up and asks my
husband if this was a government vehicle. "Yes," my husband
replied, surprised by the question. "In fact it's an unmarked
police car." "Wow!" the young man said, sliding behind the wheel.
"This will be the first time I've been in the front seat."


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