Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

6/20 - Father's Day Hippo Food

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

“So, did you read last night’s issue?” I said.

“Yeah”, my sweet wife replied.

“What did you think?”

“It was ok, except you didn’t tell what son #4 did during your

“Oh yeah, I forgot. I’ll put it in tonight’s issue.”

So here goes. Sunday I got up and started my talk by telling the
history of Father’s day. How in 1909 Mrs. Dodd of Washington State
wanted to honor her father because he raised his 6 children after
his wife died during the birth of their last child. Then I went
through the list of fathers that we could honor during Father’s
day. (Father, Grandfather, Father-in-law, Father in Heaven...)
Then I said, “So what can we do to honor our fathers on Father’s
day?” I didn’t see or hear it because they were sitting in the
back pew, but my sweet wife said son #4 shot out of his seat,
stood on the pew, raised his hand and said, “I know! Make ‘em

Maybe it’s a good thing that we sit in the last pew.

[As a side note, did you know that in the 19th centaury churches
practiced what they call “pew renting”? Those who paid the most,
sat nearest the front. I think we’re too cheap to move up...]

Ok, now I’ll leave Father’s day alone until next year, but I have
to tell one more “funny”.

The boys all needed physicals to go to Camp Hobe this summer.
After my sweet wife took them in for their appointments, son #4
pulled out a mini ‘camera’ from the toy box as a prize. It was one
of those cameras that show different animals each time you press
the button. He was ‘taking pictures’ when they walked on an
elevator that already had a middle-aged lady passenger. My sweet
wife said, “Are you going to take pictures of everyone?” He turned
to the lady and ‘snapped’ a picture, and joyfully announced,
“You’re a Hippo!”


For those of you who get this as email...
Enjoy today’s Jokes!

p.s. I heard on the radio today that Utah has a law that prohibits
purveyors of adult material from sending children email
advertisements. Utah has an email type “do not call” list. If you
add your address and they send you adult material, they can be
charged with a felony. I added my addresses.

Reader Comment Section:

It’s been too quiet around here. Cat got your tongue?


The husband stood in front of the bathroom mirror, carefully
flossing his teeth.

"Oooh!" he would sigh every once in a while, or "Aaah!" as
the little thread tortured his sensitive gums.

Suddenly and seemingly without provocation, his wife stomped into
the bathroom and gave him a swift kick.

Bewildered, the husband demanded, "What was that for?"

"I'm sorry," his wife replied stiffly, "but I just don't believe
in sighing flossers."


Two blondes were filling up at a gas station one day, when one
blonde says to the other, "I bet these awful gas prices are going
to go even higher."

"Won't bother me," replies the second blonde, "I always just get
$10 worth."


Andy, a friend of mine in the UK, hates to lose at golf. He was in
a foursome recently when his ball landed in a sand trap. Hidden
from view, the rest of us could hear him as he hacked away at his
ball. When he finally drove it out, and rejoined us, I asked him
how many strokes that was.
"Three." he replied.
"Oh come on!" said another member of the group. "I heard six."
Andy brazenly replied, "Three were echoes."


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