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Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

1/18 - Thursday Already?

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Thursday, January 18, 2007
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Wow, is it Thursday already? Time flies when you’re having fun I
guess. Son #4 lost his tooth a couple of days ago. He wants to
wait until he can borrow Grandma’s tooth box to put it under his
pillow. Only, I haven’t had a chance to stop by and pick it up
from her. Does that make me a bad parent?

This week we’re doing an install of new radiology computer
equipment in Davis County. It’s about a 45 minute drive from my
house, and I’ve had to leave there late every night. Then I’ve got
school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It makes for an interesting
week. I’m certainly glad I didn’t schedule anything on Monday
nights so I can spend some time with the family!

But, tomorrow I’ll at least get to spend some time with son #2 on
a winter campout. Brr... with temps this cold, it better be worth
it!

Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty

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The computer swallowed grandma.
Yes, honestly its true.
She pressed 'control' and 'enter'
And disappeared from view.

It devoured her completely,
The thought just makes me squirm.
She must have caught a virus
Or been eaten by a worm.

I've searched through the recycle bin
And files of every kind;
I've even used the Internet,
But nothing did I find.

In desperation, I asked Jeeves
My searches to refine.
The reply from him was negative,
Not a thing was found 'online.'

So, if inside your 'Inbox,'
My Grandma you should see,
Please 'Copy,''Scan' and 'Paste' her
And send her back to me!
~#1 Mom

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My mom has a lead foot, so I was not surprised when a state
trooper pulled us over as we were driving through Georgia. Hoping
to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shocked when he
walked up to the car. "I have never been stopped like this
before," she said to the officer. "What do they usually do,
ma'am," he asked, "shoot the tires out?"

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An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor
was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked,
"To what do you attribute your good health?"

The old timer said, "I'm a golfer and that's why I'm in such good
shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down
the fairways."

The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be
more to it. How old was your father when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my father's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your father is
still alive? How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 100 yrs old and, in fact, he golfed with
me this morning. That's why he's still alive, he's a golfer."

The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to
it. How about your grandfather? How old was he when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your
grandfather's still living! How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 118 yrs old."

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess
he went golfing with you this morning too?"

The old timer said, "No...Grandpa couldn't go this morning because
he got married."

The doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Why would a 118-year-
old guy want to get married?"

The old timer shot back, "Who said he wanted to?"

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