The Microsoft Virus
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thursday, April 14, 2005
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy, it’s almost the weekend, and boy am I ready!
A week or so ago I had my sweet wife and son #4 come downtown to
meet me for lunch. We ate at Arby’s, with my #1 mom. As we were
leaving, I took son #4 into the restroom. He’s always touching
everything, and I always say, “HEY! Don’t touch that. That’s where
people go to the bathroom. There are germs in there!” I think
finally he’s catching on. After we washed our hands he asked what
germs were, so I gave him a quick 5 second explanation. As we
walked out of the restroom, he pointed at the door, looked at
grandma and said, “There’s germs in there!”
And just the other day he was sitting on the floor crying. My sweet
wife asked what was wrong. He said, “I can’t lay down, people keep
throwing their germs on the floor!”
Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty
=-=-=-
Reader Comment Section:
"-- What's another word for thesaurus?"
The answer is lexicon, glossary, phrase book, or vocabulary.
~Jason in Denver~
p.s. These were found out using Microsoft Outlook's thesaurus
function.
[MS has so much extra stuff in their software. Have you ever heard
of an Easter egg? Try these to see what I’m talking about.]
1) Open Microsoft Word.
2) Type this: =rand (200,99)
3) Press enter and wait 3 seconds.
Here’s another one for Word 2000
1: Press the F1 key or click the Office Assistant button.
2: Under the "What would you like to do?", type "Cast".
3: Click Search.
4: Select the "Microsoft Office 2000 user assistance staff" topic.
5: Click the graphic in the Microsoft Word Help screen.
And one more for FrontPage 97, 98, or 2000
Open FrontPage (in FrontPage 98 or 97, open FrontPage Explorer).
Press and hold Shift.
Select About Microsoft FrontPage from the Help menu 3 times. Click
OK the first 2 times.
See the people who brought you FrontPage.
Thursday, April 14, 2005
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy, it’s almost the weekend, and boy am I ready!
A week or so ago I had my sweet wife and son #4 come downtown to
meet me for lunch. We ate at Arby’s, with my #1 mom. As we were
leaving, I took son #4 into the restroom. He’s always touching
everything, and I always say, “HEY! Don’t touch that. That’s where
people go to the bathroom. There are germs in there!” I think
finally he’s catching on. After we washed our hands he asked what
germs were, so I gave him a quick 5 second explanation. As we
walked out of the restroom, he pointed at the door, looked at
grandma and said, “There’s germs in there!”
And just the other day he was sitting on the floor crying. My sweet
wife asked what was wrong. He said, “I can’t lay down, people keep
throwing their germs on the floor!”
Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty
=-=-=-
Reader Comment Section:
"-- What's another word for thesaurus?"
The answer is lexicon, glossary, phrase book, or vocabulary.
~Jason in Denver~
p.s. These were found out using Microsoft Outlook's thesaurus
function.
[MS has so much extra stuff in their software. Have you ever heard
of an Easter egg? Try these to see what I’m talking about.]
1) Open Microsoft Word.
2) Type this: =rand (200,99)
3) Press enter and wait 3 seconds.
Here’s another one for Word 2000
1: Press the F1 key or click the Office Assistant button.
2: Under the "What would you like to do?", type "Cast".
3: Click Search.
4: Select the "Microsoft Office 2000 user assistance staff" topic.
5: Click the graphic in the Microsoft Word Help screen.
And one more for FrontPage 97, 98, or 2000
Open FrontPage (in FrontPage 98 or 97, open FrontPage Explorer).
Press and hold Shift.
Select About Microsoft FrontPage from the Help menu 3 times. Click
OK the first 2 times.
See the people who brought you FrontPage.
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