Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005


Tuesday, April 05, 2005

So our Scout troop is working on the physical fitness merit badge.
They do a test the first week, exercise for 12 weeks, then do a
final test to see if they progressed. One of the other requirements
is that the boys have a physical done at the beginning of the merit
badge. Son #1 had his for summer camp last year and didn’t need
one, but son #2 needed to get one. So the merit badge councilor has
been bugging us for the past 2 1/2 weeks to get done. We finally
got him to the doctor today. My sweet wife called me up afterwards
and said,

“Remember how you and I got our eyes checked last December, and we
took son #1?”

“Yes.” I said.

“Remember how the doctor told us that the 3 younger boys didn’t
need checkups until they were 12, unless there was a problem?”


“And, remember how son #2 said that he wanted to get his eyes
checked, and we just thought he wanted to get them checked because
‘it would be cool’ and he would feel ‘big’ like his older brother?”
she said.

“Ok...” I said.

“Well, we should have had him checked. He has 20/20 in one eye and
20/50 in the other eye.”

Man... talk about making you feel bad as a parent. When I saw him
tonight, I tried to sooth my feelings by saying, “Hey, sorry about
not taking you to get your eyes checked.”

His reply?

“I told you so dad.”

Oh, thanks a lot. Now I feel tons better.

Does anyone else have a story like that?

Enjoy today’s Jokes!

Reader Comment Section:

Hi Marty:

I was just reading your Thursday issue and I had to laugh at the
Star Spangled Banner joke. It reminded me of a letter to Ann
Landers from years ago that I have stuck on my fridge.

Dear Ann Landers: In one of your recent columns, a reader
complained about the lack of respect for the American national
anthem. He said some singers put their own interpretation to the
song and many people don't even know the words. It reminded me of
how we Canadian boys used to sing our variation years ago, making
fun of the Yanks. It went like this:

Oh, say, can they sing
From the start to the end
What so proudly they stand for
When orchestras play it.
How the whole congregation
In voices that blend
Strike up the grand tune
And then torture and slay it.
Hark, how proudly they shout
When they're first starting out
But the rockets red glare
Leaves them floundering about.
"Tis the Star-Spangled Banner
They're trying to sing.
But they don't know the words
Of the blessed old thing!

I just thought you might like to share that with your readers. I
enjoy your stories and your jokes. Thanks for always brightening my
(By the way, I found all four verses here: http://www.law.ou.edu/hist/ssb.html)
Kind regards,
Kathleen G.
ContestHound.com, http://www.contesthound.com
ContestHound.ca, http://www.contesthound.ca


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