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Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

4/6 - Bone Paste or Cheese & Sour Cream?

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Thursday, April 06, 2006
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We had an appointment with the surgeon and son #4 today. It was
really snowy, and the roads were bad so my sweet wife was running
a few minutes late. When she went to pick son #4 up from school,
she walked in the classroom and said hi to the teachers. They were
all sitting in the corner talking together, and all of the kids
were running and goofing around in the class. After a minute or so
she went to get son #4’s coat. The kids were still yelling,
screaming, and playing with toys. She thought it was a little
strange, and was just about to say something to the teachers when
one of them looked over her shoulder at the clock and yelled, “Ok
everybody, recess is over, back in your seats!”

I guess they still have snow day recess inside...

There is an adult finger sized indentation in son #4’s skull. It’s
where bone is missing. It started out about the size of a quarter
last September, and it just kind of grew from there. Apparently
what happens to bone when you stick it in a freezer for 6 weeks,
then do radiation treatments on it for another 6 weeks, some of
the bone dies. The surgeon said that the dead bone is being
reabsorbed into the body. He also said it’s not that uncommon or
something that we need to worry a lot about at this stage. (Oh?)
He said that it will either grow back naturally, or get worse.
(Maybe that’s why the dairy fetish?) If it gets worse, he said
there are several options we have. Then he said to, “use a helmet
on him when he rides a bike or plays sports. Keep an eye on it and
see me in 6 months. Or, if things start falling apart, come see me
sooner.”

Um, duh...

For those of you who get this as email...
Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty

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Reader Comment Section:


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At the emergency meeting of the UN regarding another conflict in the
Middle East, the floor has been given to the Israeli Consul.

The Israeli Consul began, "Ladies and gentlemen before I commence
with my speech, I wanted to relay an old story to all of you...
...When Moses was leading the Jews out of Egypt he had to go
through deserts, and prairies, and even more deserts... The people
became thirsty and needed water. So Moses struck the side of a
mountain with his cane and at the sight of that mountain a pond
appeared with crystal clean, cool water. And the people rejoiced
and drank to their hearts' content. Moses wished to cleanse his
whole body, so he went over to the other side of the pond, took
all of his clothes off and dove into the cool waters. Only when
Moses came out of the water he discovered that all his clothes had
been stolen... And I have reasons to believe that the Palestinians
stole his clothes." Yassir Arafat, hearing this accusation, jumps
out of his seat and screams, "This is a travesty...It's A lie !
It is widely known that there were no Palestinians there at the
time!!!" "And in agreement with Chairman Arafat," said the Israeli
Consul, "let me begin my speech..."


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The minister's car wouldn't start and so he called the garage to
come and tow it in for repairs. When the truck driver appeared at
his house to get the car, the minister says, "I hope you go easy
on me. You know I'm only a poor preacher." "I know," replied the
tow truck driver... "I've heard you preach."

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Two paramedics were dispatched to check on a 92-year-old man who
had become disoriented. They decided to take him to the hospital
for evaluation. En route, with siren going, they questioned the
man to determine his level of awareness. Leaning close, one
asked, "Sir, do you know what we're doing right now?" The old man
slowly looked up at him, then gazed out the ambulance window.
"Oh," he replied, "I'd say about 50, maybe 55."

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