Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

5/2 - Fame isn't all it's cracked up to be

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Well, it seems I’ve got plenty of time to write tonight’s issue. I
caught my ride to the conference center at 5PM at the church by my
house, and it’s now 9PM. We haven’t even gotten to my first scene,
(scene 11). But, instead of sitting like a bump on a log, I
decided I’d wanted to participate. So, I’m helping move the stairs
on and off the set between scenes.

Now, c’mon... not everyone can be a star!

It’s been a tough day for my family too. Son #3 woke up with a
rash all over him, and ended up on amoxicillin. Son #4 said he had
an earache, my sweet wife broke her toe on a doorframe, and son #2
missed his ride to the conference center. (He was at a friend’s
house, playing video games and didn’t hear our frantic phone calls
or door knocks. I think he owes Grandma and Grandpa $5 in gas

Now I’m home, and get to do it all over again tomorrow.

I did get some video of practice. I’ll see if I can figure out how
to post it on the web site soon.

For those of you who get this as email...
Enjoy today’s Jokes!

Reader Comment Section:

Ok... you posted your intellectual quote, I'll send you my funny

"When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle.
It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself."
- Author, who knows.

Doug S.


Flying home after visiting her daughter in England, she arranged
to have her husband meet her plane at the Vancouver, B.C. airport.
This meant a stop at the border crossing between the United States
and Canada, where her husband was asked: "What is your reason for
entering the country?" and "How long are you planning to stay?" He
replied that he was picking his wife up at the airport after her
trip to England. Without missing a beat, the guard asked two more
questions in the same businesslike tone: "Is the house clean?" and
"Are there fresh flowers on the table?"


I accompanied my husband when he went to get a haircut. Reading a
magazine, I found a hairstyle I liked for myself, and I asked the
receptionist if I could take the magazine next door to make a copy
of the photo. "Leave some ID, a driver's license or a credit
card," she said. "But my husband is here getting a haircut," I
explained. "Yes," she replied. "But I need something you'll come
back for."


Tired of being a golf widow, a woman took up the game and wound up
playing with her husband on a country course one day. He hit his
drive way off into the rough, behind a barn. She came over to take
a look, surveyed the situation, and suggested that if he opened
both barn doors he could hit his ball straight through the barn to
the green. He saw this as an excellent idea, complimented her for
her suggestion, then opened the doors and stepped up to the ball.
He made a swing and great contact. Unfortunately, the ball was off
line, careened off the door frame, hit the wife in the head and
killed her. Years went by, the man finally remarried, and this
time found himself a golfer for a wife. Incredibly, the same
situation occurs. The man is in the rough behind the same barn.
His new wife took a look at his ball and suggested that he could
make the green if he opened both barn doors and hit through the
barn. "No way," he says. "I can't do that." "Why not?" she asks.
"The last time I did that something terrible happened." "What?"
she asked. "I got a double bogey."


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