Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

4/27 - Spend Your $$ on May 1st!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

I was feeling pretty good about my lines at play practice tonight.
I told my sweet wife, “I nailed all of my lines except for one
line in the second act that I goofed up on.” I was feeling pretty
good about life until she said, “Um, yeah, but you said one of the
lines from the second act, in the first act. It would have thrown
off the whole play.”

Oops... Good thing the play doesn’t start until May 11th.

Our schedule for play practice starts Saturday, then every night
except Sunday and Monday until the play. On Tuesday we start to
practice downtown at the 905 seat theater at the Conference
. Guess I’ll have to miss scouts for a week or so. (Good
thing I have great assistances working with me!)

Then, after the play, its Disney World bound. Everyone in the
family is getting excited about that. Son #4 puts a sticker on his
Disney calendar every day and talks about going a lot. And, since
this is such a big vacation, I have to buy a new camcorder. You
see, the one I have that’s stuffed in a closet, is one of those
huge things from the 80’s. You carry it on your shoulder, and put
a full sized VCR tape into it. I’m not sure, but I’ve heard that
they’re a little smaller now.

(This one is even smaller than mine!)

And I was going to buy it in a week or two just before the trip,
but I hear that there’s some sort of boycott on buying stuff on
May 1st. I don’t agree with the boycott at all, and want to do my
part to scuttle it. So I’m going to buy the camcorder on Monday
and try to tip the scales just a bit to my way of thinking. And,
I’ll buy at least one other major purchase that day; a tank of
gas. You too ought to save up your shopping and spend spend spend
on Monday!

For those of you who get this as email...
Enjoy today’s Jokes!


You know a fashion trend is over when your grandmother starts
getting into it. At least, that's the thinking in England, where a
bunch of grannies are donning hooded sweatshirts and baseball caps
-- the favorite uniform of gang members -- in an effort to
discourage crime. Said one senior, to The Daily Telegraph: Once
old people start wearing these clothes, "they lose all their
street cred."


Upon returning from Iraq, I received a number of commendations and
medals, including the Bronze Star for meritorious achievement.
Still, my daughter was unimpressed. "Who won the Silver and the
Gold?" she asked.


"Today in Mexico it was the day of the dead. It's the holiday
where people from Mexico celebrate all the departed souls that are
now living in Los Angeles!" --Jay Leno


Last October my wife bought a magnolia tree from the local
nursery, but after only a few weeks the leaves shriveled. It
appeared to be on its last legs. My wife took some leaf samples
and marched into the nursery to demand an explanation. "I know
exactly what's wrong with your magnolia," said the manager.
"Good," said my wife. "What's it suffering from?" "Autumn," he


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