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Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

4/18 - Log oh what?

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Wednesday, April 18, 2007
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The sun, moon, and stars all lined up tonight. No Scouts, Relief
Society meetings, or school. After dinner I asked, “do we have
anything to do tonight?” Everyone said, “No!” It doesn’t happen
that often on a Wednesday night, so we decided to watch a move we
had rented; “Akeelah and the Bee”. It’s about a girl in a poor
neighborhood in LA who goes to the Scripts Spelling Bee.

There were a lot of impressive words in there, but the second to
last spelling word of the movie really got my boys rolling on the
floor. “Logorrhea.” (pronounced Log-Oh-Ree-ah) They thought that
was the funniest thing in the world. “That kid looked like he was
about to have a logorrhea dad!” They laughed and laughed on that
one...

Then again, if you look at the word, it really is kinda funny.
“logo” can mean voice, words, or to know. “rrhea” as in diarrhea,
means... well, we all know what it means. Logorrhea literally
means “excessive flow of words”. So, I guess my boys really did
know what they were laughing at.

Enjoy Today’s Jokes!
Marty

p.s. Ok, that was kind of lame. But, it took up a bit of space.
Here’s another funny; at dinner tonight we had meatloaf with baked
potatoes. When son #4 bit into his potato, he said, “That’s hot!”
I quickly said, “Yo Momma...” paused for just a second, and
thought, ‘sure’ and finished my thought saying, “Yo Momma’s hot!”
and looked over to my sweet wife to wink. Son #4 looked at me as
if to roll his eyes and said, “Yeah, dad. ~that~ was a good one.”

I don’t think my sweet wife liked that comment.

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Reader Comment section

Tooth fairy stuff. Six kids and I couldn't even get it right for
the first one. I ended up telling her there was no tooth fairy, it
was me (man did that break her heart…) but what we ended up doing
turned out to be pretty cool and we continued on until there just
weren't any more teeth to lose. We would make it a game to see if
I could sneek / switch the tooth for the money without them
catching me. I never did get caught. Before that, sometimes it
would take the tooth fairy up to a week to get to our house. After
that, at bed time she/they would remind me to try to sneek in.
Turned out to be pretty neat, actually.

Thanks for letting me share. Thanks for sharing your adventures
and being such a good example, going back to college!...
Lois


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Today’s Videos

Look at that! A YouTuber’s hamsters breaks his speed record and
can not slow down any more!!!



Guy can blow perfect underwater bubble circles – for more than a
minute!



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Because I couldn't unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had to
dismantle the entire fixture, no small feat for a non-plumber.

Jammed inside the drain was a purple rubber dinosaur, which
belonged to my five-year-old son.

I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the tank
filled, and I flushed it. However, it didn't work much better than
before! As I pondered what to do next, my son walked into the
bathroom. I pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged
and told him that the toilet still wasn't working. "Did you get
the green one, too?" he asked.

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At three minutes and four seconds after 2 AM on the 6th of May
this year, the time and date will be 02:03:04 05/06/07.
~Wanda D.

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Helpful Tips to Make Life Simple

* Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply
cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.

* Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone
by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and
occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the curb.

* Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned
to fast wipe whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

* No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and remove the
dirt by simply peeling it off.

* Apply red nail polish to your nails before clipping them. The
red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroom carpet.
(Unless you have a red carpet, in which case a contrasting polish
should be selected).

* If a person is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour
a jug of boiling water down their throat and presto! The blockage
is almost instantly removed.

* Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whiskey. The
following morning you can create the effects of hangover by
drinking a thimble full of dish washing liquid and banging
your head repeatedly on the wall.

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