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Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

4/17 - Weather Test

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007
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Another test in Biology lab today. I think I did pretty good, but
again, we’ll just have to wait and see. Not much happening today
in the funny boy raising department.

How about the weather? It was almost 70º today, tomorrow it’s
supposed to snow. That’s Utah weather for ya.

Enjoy today’s offerings.

Enjoy Today’s Jokes!
Marty

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Reader Comments

[About Imus]
Marty, I'm a little behind on my emails, but I just wanted to let
you know I agree with you 100% about Imus! Like you, I think what
he said was stupid, but no worse then what others on the radio and
tv have said who are allowed to make such comments with impunity.
It was definitely a double standard and it wasn't fair.
Eddie

[About the Tooth Fairy]
Hate to admit I can top that, but I can top that. For me, it
seems my middle son (of my 3 sons) seems to get it the worst.
The first night we forgot. We reminded him that two other kids at
church had teeth out - they each had had several pulled. Maybe the
tooth fairy got too busy and couldn't make it across town? The
second night, we forgot. Well maybe she couldn't find it, was it
too far under the pillow, lost in the sheets? After the third
night of forgetting, my son came in my room in tears. I went to
his room with him, my wheels were turning - how could I be such a
bad mom? I told him hang on, I've got to talk to dad. Back
in my bedroom I quickly got out my fairy supplies (yes, I have
supplies) I rubbed a little glue on the $2 bill, sprinkled it
lightly with glitter - fairy dust. Then for the big lie. Son, I
think I know what happened. Last night your dad heard something,
he went to see what it was - I THINK HE SCARED AWAY THE TOOTH
FAIRY. Come here quick (over to the front door). Look, what's
that? Of course, I had already dropped the prepared $2 bill on
the floor....
MH - Wyoming

[Fwew. Someone else worse than we are at the Tooth fair game!]

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Today’s Video

Hmm... Smart kid.


This Rabbit sure has some testosterone!


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"Today Switzerland and France battled to a zero-zero tie in the
World Cup soccer finals. I can't imagine why this sport hasn't
caught on in America."
~Jay Leno

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As a realtor, I deal with all types of people. Recently, I showed
a home to a couple who seemed eager to check out the fantastic
view from the living room. But when I dramatically pulled back the
drapes, the disappointed husband asked, "Where is the view? Those
mountains must be blocking it."

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1. A day without sunshine is like night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese.
9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet
engines.
19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What
the heck happened?"
22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall
off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of
jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

~Wanda D.

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