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Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Friday, September 16, 2005

9/16 - That's just not fair...

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Friday, September 16, 2005
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It’s Friday. Not my usual day to do an issue, but... The stars
seemed to have lined up just right. Justin seems to be a no-show
today, there was a Cub pack meeting tonight, so no date night
with my sweet wife, and I worked overtime on Wednesday and
missed an issue, which produced guilt; so, here I am...

We have a very small Cub pack. There are only 4 boys, including
son #3. So, at pack meeting when it’s game time, or running
around time, sons #1, #2, and #4 also get into the act. Son #4
was running around like not a thing in the world was wrong with
him. He played in all of the games and participated in
everything. I wish I felt that good...

We got a package today from the Children’s Brain Tumor
Foundation. It had all sorts of cool stuff in it. A book about a
teddy bear with a tumor, some Sponge Bob Square pants cards, a
Michael Bublè CD, and a teddy bear with a red bandanna ‘rag’ on
him. (We won’t take him to the state fair, I promise.) In the
last 4 weeks, son #4 has been showered with all manner of gifts,
visitors, cookies, cakes, candy, and ice cream. So, with this
batch of stuff, the bear ended up as moms, and the rest of the
toys were tagged as “everyone’s” toys. Boy, it’s not easy
keeping a kid with a tumor unspoiled. Who would of ever thought
we’d be faced with ~that~ problem. Interesting...

Then, in the package there was a book titled, “if I get to
five”. Oh, that’s just so not fair. When I got home from work
and saw the book cover I put it down and went to my room and did
my 5 minutes of daily crying.

Stupid tumor.

Ok, now let’s make that a total 6 minutes today.

Well, that means less blubbering tomorrow, right? Right!

Sorry. Something funny now.

At the pack meeting we have a great Cub Master. He handed out
some cards for staying safe. We talked about what to do when
you’re lost, and then we talked a little bit about flag
etiquette. We talked about how to put a flag at half mast; (All
the way up briskly, then down half way, slowly.) Anyway, he
asked the pack, “Does anyone know why all of the flags are being
flown half mast this week?” Son #4 was sitting on my sweet
wife’s lap and said, “Because I’m sick?”

No son, not quite.

Anyway,
Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty

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Reader Comment Section:

Speaking of all things "mandatory," I applied for a store credit
card at Future Shop. Just as I was about to sign on the dotted
line, I noticed that a $25.00 membership fee would be applied to
the first month's statement. When I questioned this fee, the
clerk told me this is a mandatory fee, it's part of the package
that allows you to buy very expensive electronic stuff and then
take 3 months to pay for it, without interest. I asked the clerk
to cancel the whole application, since I have no "interest"
(there's a pun for you!) in paying a fee for the privilege of
buying stuff. They told me I would have to call the head office
on Monday to cancel my account... ...I explained that I wanted
to cancel my account. When she asked for the reason, I replied
that I did not want to pay the $25.00 fee. "Oh," she said,
"we'll waive that fee." Wait a minute, I said, how can you just
waive the fee, if it's mandatory? "Oh," she said, "we'd rather
have your continued business than your membership fee." Then why
do you charge the fee in the first place? I asked. "Oh," she
said, "We have to. It's mandatory." I can only quote Homer
Simpson ... "D'oh!"
~Joanne - Montreal, Canada

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