Look Out! The Doctor's got a GUN!!

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Wednesday, February 02, 2005
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Remember the movie tickets that my sweet wife got the other day with son #4 and the macaroni? Well, the tickets were for a world premier of a move called ‘Sons of Provo’. It’s about a Boy Band from Provo. It’s a comedy, and won some festival awards. Anyway, my sweet wife liked it a lot, but I’m not sure yet. I’ll have to sleep on it. Anyway, the actors were there and were answering questions before the move. I even shook one of them. So, now I’m famous. Big deal.

Anyway, here’s the story I’m trying to get to; Son #3 got a rock tumbler for Christmas. Well, as things go, the instructions got lost. While we were gone, son #1 was trying to help set it up. When we walked in, it sounded like it was going pretty good. Then son #1 said, “Mom, without the instructions, I’m not sure we used the right amount of vaseline that came with the kit. I said, “You don’t have to use that much, you just have to use a dab where the axel part is.” He looked at me really funny, and then I said, “Here, I’ll show you.” When we looked at it, it was turning, but I didn’t see any vaseline. I picked up the tumbler and said, “Here, here’s where you put it. It’s to make is spin easier.” Then I asked him where he put the vaseline. He got this stupid look on his face. I said, “No... you didn’t...” He said, “Well, son #3 said that’s where it went...”

They had put the vaseline in with the rocks.

Hmm... I guess we all have blonde moments once in awhile.

Enjoy today’s Jokes!
Marty

p.s. Sorry about today's Reader section. I guess I had a bee in my
bonnet!

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Reader Comment Section:

Marty, With all due respect, the figure for accidental deaths
caused by physicians per year being 120,000 is too absurdly
erroneous to be acceptable in a joke. I do not wish to make any
presumptions about the submitter for writer of the joke, but this
is one you should have kept out. For sure, in a few days every card
carrying member of the NRA and anyone with a grudge against a
physician, legitimate or not, is going to be touting the figure as
being accurate and having come from a reliable source.
Mark

[Ok folks. Flame suits on... I’m in a mood...]

[Hmm...So now I’m a reliable source? We could use that as a joke
tomorrow! Actually, I disagree with you quite vociferously.

>the figure for accidental deaths caused by physicians per year
>being 120,000 is too absurdly erroneous...

Mark, here’s an interesting article;
“Doctors Are The Third Leading Cause of Death in the US, Causing
250,000 Deaths Every Year”
Barbara Starfield
Journal American Medical Association Vol 284 July 26, 2000
http://www.dorway.com/jama.html

> but this is one you should have kept out.

I know. But I think the info is already out there. When you put in
the words “Doctors Guns accidental deaths” in Google, there are
120,000+ references to this very same information.

> For sure, in a few days every card carrying member of the NRA and
> anyone with a grudge against a physician, legitimate or not, is
> going to be touting the figure as being accurate and having come
> from a reliable source.

I know, I know. JAMA isn’t a very reliable source of medical
information, and no one should quote that rag. And you’re right;
Every evil card carrying member of that wicked NRA organization
reads my joke list... and uses it as a reliable source...

But, you know what they say about statistics...

Statistics can be made to prove anything - even the truth.
~Author Unknown

98% of all statistics are made up.
~Author Unknown

There are three kinds of lies - lies, damned lies and statistics.
~Benjamin Disraeli
(Commonly misattributed to Mark Twain because he quotes Disraeli in Autobiography)

Ok, folks. You may take your flame suits off. And you can call the
kids back into your computer room. Hmm... Maybe I should have done
a movie review instead.]