Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Groundbreaking Revelation!

Thursday, February 03, 2005

On the way home from school the other day, my sweet wife and son #1
were having a serious conversation. He said, “Ya know mom, I’ve
finally figured out how to treat girls.” My sweet wife listened
intently for a groundbreaking revelation. He said, “You treat ‘em
just like everyone else...”

Hmm... I think he thought too much about that one!

Enjoy today’s Jokes!

Reader Comment Section:

Dear Marty,
Ouch. It appears that the figures which I just couldn`t accept are
apparently true. I am, to say the least, astounded. I certainly
harbor no ideas that medical treatment in the US is supperior (I`ve
exprienced my share of ineptness in the doctor`s office), but I
just could comprehend the figure of 120,000 as being anything close
to accurate. ... ... I find myself guilty of something I personally
preach; check your figures before you pass them on. ... In addition,
I would like to offer my deepest apologies if I
offended you personally. It wasn`t my intention. Thank you for
responding to my comments in a gentlemanly fashion!

[No need for deep apologies, I wasn’t offended in any way. Although
after re-reading my post, it may have looked like it. But I wasn’t.
And, as far as responding in a gentlemanly fashion, I commend your
response as well... Thanks! Marty]

Ok, Marty. All stats aside, isn't the idea of this ezine to be
humor? And shouldn't we take it all with a grain of salt? Why
should we get flamed or inflamed over any of it. Read it and
laugh, or read it and delete. Ain't it simple?
~Linda B.

[You must have older children... You sound like my wise #1 mom!]

Marty, LOL! I can't believe anyone actually questioned you on the
Doctors/Guns/Lawyers joke! ... Geez, someone needs to take a doggy
Todd C. - Card Carrying Life Member of the NRA

I'm not sure if your stats are correct... ...I suggest you take a
look at the definition [of iatrogenic] in the dictionary and then
[When you] Google iatrogenic there were 326,000 hits. Read the 1st
dozen or so. I usually check absurdities out on one of the rumor
sites, I had gotten both the "Hanoi Jane Fonda" & the
"Microsoft/AOL/Bill Gates/$1000 rebate" in this mornings e-mail for
the umpteenth time.
I certainly see the humor in the post about guns & Dr's but I do
see where people might be offended.
I really enjoy your posts, the jokes and the family anecdotes
Norman O.

Good rebuttal, Marty! Way to stand firm. "...too absurdly
erroneous to be acceptable in a joke"?!?!?!? That line in itself
is a joke. Since when does a joke have to contain fact? Holy cow,
people! Remember that this is a joke list and an equal-opportunity
offender. Any similarities to truth is purely coincidental. I have
seen that joke now about three or four times in the ten or so years
I have had an email address, and I have yet to hear those numbers
quoted as statistics in some NRA or gun rights rally. Hmmm...

Incidentally, the next time I feel sick or break my arm, I am for
sure going to buy a gun instead of visit the doctor. Doctors just
aren't safe.
Justin H.

First: Get the flame suit on again! Im a card carring member of the
NRA and I don't know a soul that would call me evel! Then again I
don't know all that meny others and no one else in the NRA!
Second : I hope you did not shake that poor boy band member too
badly! You know how fragel those boy band members are? Keep up the
good work!
~Don W.

[Thanks Don. At first I had no idea what you were talking about,
about the boy band. Then Sandra sent me this...]

How did you shake one of them? In the air above your head or just
Sandra H.

[I still didn’t know what you guys were talking about, so I sent
her this:]

[Shake one of what?]
[Sorry, was up kinda late last night. (Grin)]

You said you shook them instead of maybe saying you shook their
hand. Just having fun with your sleepy head.:)
Sandra H.

[D’oh! I meant I shook his HAND, not him! So much for proof reading
at midnight! And for those of you who know who I’m talking about,
it was Kirby I shook hands with. Wany my autograph?]

You shook an actor? Isn't that assault? Was that you I saw on the
news? Is that why you're famous?
Justin H.

[Famous? Pa-Shaw... I’m so famous, yesterday in the elevator I met
an elderly lady who I worked with at the state 4 years ago. She
said, “Oh, yeah, I thought you looked familiar. What was your first
name again?” *sigh* I guess I made a big impression when I worked


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