Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Monday, January 07, 2008

1/7 - Resolutions

Monday, January 07, 2008

Boy oh boy, lots to update you on!

Let’s start with Christmas shopping. [This story reminds me way back in the summer of 2004, when we went to Lake Tahoe for vacation, and I tried to teach the boys a great lesson. Check out the link to ‘the sign’ to see a sweet picture of son #4 3 1/2 years ago!]

This Christmas season the hot item is the Nintendo Wii game system. My sweet wife and I had been looking for one off and on for months. We didn’t look super hard, but always had our eyes open, but we never could find one. Because son #4 had his MRI exactly one week before Christmas, we wanted to get everything “done” before we found out the results of the MRI, just in case. We had resigned ourselves to the fact that we weren’t going to find a Wii system this year. (Darn! They look so cool too...)

So, we went shopping and decided to get 3 of the boys a Nintendo DS lite game system. These little things are so cool, you can play them alone, with each other wirelessly, over a wireless network, and even hook up to the Nintendo Wii gaming system. (Dang, if we only could find a Wii system!) We decided on the DS because son #4 already got one as a gift when we went to the Hanna Montana Concert, and everyone in the house loved it. (And no, we didn’t have to lie to win tickets, saying my father died in Iraq. My dad’s death on Christmas day two years ago was excitement enough for me. And as long as I’m digressing... We pulled off Christmas dinner at our house this year! Turkey, stuffing, potatoes, and nobody died!]

Anyway, back to my story; My sweet wife and I found ourselves at a placed called Game Crazy. We found 3 Nintendo DS systems, a game each, and a couple of games for a giving tree project at work. I’m pretty quick at math, and we had a (loose) budget to work with for Christmas, so I knew pretty close to what the total would be. After an hour in the store, we were at the checkout line. There was a new guy running the register who had to ask the manager different questions about everything. To make a long story short, he rang us up and told me the total. I said, “That doesn’t sound like the right amount.” He said he was sure it was. The manager was standing there and I said, “Are you sure you guys charged me enough?” He joked and said, “You guys could give us a huge tip if you want.” I smiled and waited a few more minutes before the clerk handed me my receipt. I looked at it and said, “No, look, you only charged me for 2 DS systems, not 3.” We had to wait an additional 15 minutes in line, with the manager calling the main office, filling out paperwork, trying to undo what the new kid had done. Though I left there $120 lighter in the pocket, I have a clear conscience.

That was a few days before son #4’s MRI, and we were completely done with getting ready for Christmas. The Thursday after the MRI, I was attending a meeting and had my laptop set up. I was talking with a guy next to me about Wii systems, and he said he wanted to get one, but had no idea where to look. I told him about wiitracker.com and showed him the site. (Ok, this was a boring meeting) Low and behold, wiitracker.com had found some available at ToysRUs.com (But only if you paid for overnight shipping.) I jumped at the chance. (That’s the package I told you about, that I was expecting on Friday, or Saturday before Christmas. It was finally delivered late Christmas Eve.) Now, we have wii!

My #1 mom got to play one at my brother’s house before Thanksgiving in California, and then our system after Christmas. She liked it so much that she ended up buying one on-line, saying, “...it’s supposed to be good exercise.” I think she just likes beating me bowling... My Brother-in-law-with-4-kids-who-lives-across-the-valley-from-us also got a wii for Christmas. All of the cousins have tons of fun playing each other. My Rocket-Scientist-Brother-in-law-from-California-who-has-3-kids got to play ours while he was here. His family wants one really bad, (especially my sister-in-law, who apparently rocks at Guitar Hero) but he kept saying, “I don’t have any time for one!” We know, Roy, you really do want one... [I can see him rolling his eyes as he reads this...] They are available from wiitracker.com as I type... (Grin)

Rib’n aside. What made me go so over my Christmas budget this year? I guess it’s a combination of things. Looking forward, we’re only going to have 3 more Christmas seasons, at most, with the boys at home. It’s kind of sad to think about it. Son #1 will be turning 19, and will hopefully choose an LDS mission. Two years after that, it will be son #2’s turn. And, we all know that anything can happen with our health... Things are good right this second, and I’m a bit apprehensive of what might happen in the future. I just want to have time stop for awhile.

I like the statement; “Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes!”

When the New Year gets here, I hear people say, “I don’t make resolutions, because I can never keep them.” This year I’m going to at least try. Here are my goals; I lost a total of 28 pounds, but with Thanksgiving in Chicago, and Christmas and New Years just after that, I’ve gained 6 back. A struggle, but I’m going to stick with it. I also decided to read the scriptures on a more regular basis. I’ve started with the New Testament, in Matthew. So far so good. For my last resolution, I decided to go back to College... again. I’ve signed up for an anatomy class, strictly for work (they’ll pay 100%) and a business class, just because it sounded interesting. (I think work will pay 70%). So, New Year is a time to at least try to improve yourself. What will you do to improve yourself?

And, one funny thing that I remember from the holidays; Every year we go to the in-laws on Christmas eve. We carol, have hot wassail, and perform the Christmas pageant while reading from the Bible. Son #4 told my sweet wife that he wanted to play one of the wise men this year, so he could give baby Jesus presents of, “Gold Frankenstein and Fur”.

Well, almost...

Enjoy Today’s Jokes


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