Marty's Joke of the Day

Marty's Joke of the day is an internet column that I've written for more than 5 years.
I tell humorous stories about my "sweet wife" and raising our 4 young sons, named #1, #2, #3, and #4.
After 5 years of story telling, in August of 2005, doctors found a brain tumor in son #4.
Our focus here has changed little as we still try to find humor in our lives.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

11/7 - It's finally over

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Election day is here. All of the polling places are closed. And
the best thing about the end of today? No more political ads! Yes!
I actually voted for someone in the (shudder) other party. We had
two neighbors (both good friends) had competing signs in their
yards. I liked the one candidate, and my sweet wife liked the
other. Guess our votes canceled out those guys...

We took our 12th trip to Randolph last Saturday. I spent 6 hours
cleaning my dad’s bedroom. It actually looks presentable now. The
rest of the house is coming along fairly good too. But, there’s
still a lot of ‘stuff’ that needs to be dealt with before we can
sell the place. More work.

Tonight my sweet wife made meatloaf. It wasn’t bad, but when son
#3 came down to tell me dinner was ready, he said, “Mom burned
herself. And she swore.” I went upstairs and asked what happened
and she said she grabbed the thermometer after it sat in the oven
for 5 minutes, “But I didn’t swear! I caught myself before I
finished. Promise!”

So tonight’s dinner conversation revolved around son #3 saying,
“She said ‘Ouch! D-word it’” and she saying she stopped short of
actually saying the D-word. Oh well, it’s been a good 6 months
since we had anything but fart noise payments into the pizza jar.
And I think I was the last $5 contributor for colorful language.
This time I may just slip a fiver in to settle their argument.

Enjoy today’s Jokes!


One day a mother took her 6-year-old son with her to visit a
friend at work. Everyone there knew her, and she was offered a cup
of coffee. That day, as one of the employees went to make more
coffee, her son followed her and asked, "What are you doing?" "I'm
making your mom's favorite drink," she answered. Imagine the
woman's shock when she heard her son say, "Wow! You know how to
make beer?"


One of my college friends asked a group of us for advice on
organizing his final report for the year. "Why don't you use Roman
numerals to head the different sections?" another friend
suggested. "I thought of that," he replied. "But my keyboard
doesn't have Roman numerals on it."
~Wanda D.

There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles so she
decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local
park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this
note: "I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown
bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 A.M. Signed,
The Blonde." She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket
and told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned
to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak
tree, just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following
note.... "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde
would do this to another!"
~Wanda D.


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